Debbie's Place

A Patient's Point of View

Author: Debbie Wilson (page 2 of 14)

What If?

What If?
What if evil is in our mind, not inside our aspiring heart and souls.
What if the mind wants to taste the whole world, piece by piece.
What if the heart and soul wants to embrace the whole world as a
unit or as one. What if the heart feels that the whole world belongs
to it. What if the mind says, “This is mine. That is yours.” What if the
more the mind can separate……. the greater joy the mind gets. What
if evil is really a sense of separateness. What if when there is union,
there is no evil. What if we have good will, love, a feeling of oneness,
then instead of destroying the world, we could try to embrace the
whole world. What if we collectively could make this what IS not what if!

Was Your Day Lost?

As you sit down during the lowering of today’s sun,
And reflect on the acts you have done, was kindness one?
Did you try to help relieve someone else’s stress or strain?
With your actions were you sure to try and also be kind?
Did you in your own way try to help ease someone else’s pain?
If you did any of these things then today you truly shined!
When you sit down during the lowering of today’s sun,
You can be proud of yourself for the things you have done.
But if instead your interest and concern was all on yourself this day,
Perhaps it is time to try a new and more fulfilling kind of way.
If you weren’t able to offer a smile to help cheer another’s heart,
You will miss feeling like you accomplished your personal part.
If, you cannot quite yet conquer these particular trials,
Please remember we give others hope with just a simple smile!
If as you sit down during the lowering of todays sun,
And take the time to count the special acts you have done,
You will realize love and kindness can always start with just one.

Needless Suffering

A quarter century ago, life as I knew it, came to a screeching halt.
An unexpected almost fatal injury left my brain and body to atrophy.
I couldn’t come back to live among the living no matter how hard I tried.
I lost my digestive organs and chronic wasting took a hold of me.
I was not eligible for surgery so a neck brace stayed full time on me.
I was left with years of life threatening seizures daily hurting me badly.
I tried all the medicines, and other treatments eligible to help or treat me.
I tried hard yet I failed and was not eligible for any of the brain surgeries.
I am sure feeling a lot like the old me the one that I lost access to 25 years ago.
Medical cannabis took those life threatening seizures finally away from me.
Medical cannabis makes up for a dozen prescription medicines taken daily.
Medical cannabis makes up for a helmet, neck brace and diapers years worn by me
Medical cannabis taught me that the brain and many other organs can heal these catastrophes.
Medical cannabis is what taught me how many have suffered and died so very needlessly.
Medical cannabis enabled me to write so this neurology news can be shared across the sea.
Medical cannabis taught me that treatment without access to the miracle of cannabis is pure cruelty.
Medical cannabis was the miracle I desperately searched for and I am grateful my family and I no longer
have to be medical refugees.


A seizure aura starts as a flutter, as light as a butterfly,
Then I start floating, detached and free.
But as the tingling spreads through me,
And I recognize this feeling,
It is as if this body no longer belongs to me.
Now all my senses are fading,
All sound seems far away.
My heart is rapidly racing,
And my mind is unclear.
I identify with this feeling,
And it is the feeling of fear!
This aura is my warning,
One I must always heed,
This aura is my emergency alert,
It gives me the time that I need.
I will prepare for my landing,
As a pilot and his plane.
My landing point is crucial,
Wherever I land I will feel no shame.
It starts as a flutter, as light as a butterfly,
But it ends in a crash landing.
As the plane falls from the sky,
I look for a safe place to land.
My aura is the instrument panel,
Telling me not to continue to stand.
It may start as a flutter, as light as a butterfly,
I may start floating detached and free.
But this aura is my warning,
That I must protect me.
I am the pilot, my body is the plane.

Thanks For Our Special Teachers

Thanks for making us feel genuinely greeted each and every day,
Thanks for having patience and never making us feel in your way.
Thanks from your students that may not be able to write, hear or speak,
Thanks for meeting our special challenges daily and week to week.
Thanks on the days that our progress may seem like its going extra slow,
Thanks for accepting that we have challenges most people won’t ever know.
Thanks for helping us with our life skills it is much more than a good deed,
Thanks for being our special teacher your time with us helps us to succeed.
Thanks for always continuing to give us your welcoming and genuine smile,
Thanks for not seeming to mind if learning and doing things takes us a while.
Thanks for working and studying with us in your own special way every day,
Thanks for realizing we all have individual needs and for guiding us our own way.
Thanks for being our mentor too and working hard to be a teacher such as you,
Thanks and you need to know our families are also grateful for everything you do.

The Gift of THC for Patients

Dear friends, I get so frustrated at all the patients that propaganda has negatively impacted when it comes to the THC “high”. As a patient very used to horrible side effects please, please give me medical cannabis with THC! According to the DEA with THC I can and do FEEL the following: “THC causes a user to feel euphoric — or ‘high’ — by acting in the brain’s reward system, areas of the brain that respond to stimuli! THC activates the reward system by stimulating brain cells to release the chemical dopamine.” Dopamine is a wonderful thing it keeps us motivated and happy! I am an epilepsy patient and CBD alone is not enough for me! I do greatly enjoy THC and that is something I can NOT say about any side effect from pharmaceutical medicines! Please look deeper than the propaganda and I am talking about cannabis treatment for children also! Believe me most would agree that THC is wonderful for most patients! There is no comparison patients would greatly prefer to feel happy than experience horrible side effects!

Clonazapam Detox Update

Dear friends, I have now been detoxing off my last pharmaceutical medicine Clonazapam (Klonopin). Two years ago I tried and failed to come off this medication. I ran into trouble trying to reduce my last 2 mg. I am thrilled to share that I have successfully made the cut from 2 mg to 1 mg for the very first time! I had two days of mild breakthrough seizures and that was all! All my other withdrawal symptoms were much milder than any detox in my medical history! I had been told by my doctors that the long history of Klonopin use had changed the structure of my brain. I was told I would never be able to successfully come off of this medicine! I am thankful to share that medical cannabis has made this last detox possible! This makes my pharmaceutical medication reduction from 44 per pills to 1 a day in 6 years and counting down! Miracles really do happen with cannabis use!

Klonopin Detox with Cannabis

Dear friends, I have began my last detox off my last prescription medicine. It is Clonazepam (Klonopin) and I have taken very high doses for over twenty years as my epilepsy rescue medication. I tried to come off it last year and I was not successful. When I tried before each time I made my cut from 2 mg to 1 mg it triggered seizures. I have been seizure free for 3 years and I am determined to do my best to come off this last medication slowly and successfully with the help of medical cannabis!  If I am able to do this successfully I will have given up all 44 pills I used to take per day!

Something was Wrong


My face is numb,
My heart is racing,
I feel very confused,
Something is wrong, I say.
I fall to the floor,
I must have fainted,
I have never fainted,
Something is wrong, I say.
I see the doctor.
He says it must be blood sugar problems,
Test is normal,
Something is wrong, I say.
I see the doctor.
He says it must be a heart problem,
I collapse during the stress test,
Something is wrong, I say.
Cardiologist calls the Neurologist,
It looked like a seizure, says Cardiologist,
Neurologist does another EEG,
Test is normal.
Neurologist says it cannot be a seizure.
Something is wrong, I say.
Neurologist says too much stress,
I keep collapsing,
I go to the hospital,
Something is wrong, I say.
I’m put on a Psychiatric Unit.
Psychiatrist orders more tests.
Tests are normal.
Something is wrong, I say.
Again EEG is normal,
Psychiatrist orders a mobile EEG.
The nurse takes me to the mall,
I have three seizures in one hour,
Psychiatrist tells me I have seizures.
Something is wrong, I say.
I’m put on Tegretol,
Life gets better,
Two weeks later,
I had an allergic reaction to the medicine.
I’m put on Dialantin,
Something is wrong, I say.
I’m having more seizures than ever.
Neurologist says, If you have your tubes tied,
I can help you.
I don’t want my tubes tied,
I do want my life back,
I have my tubes tied.
I’m then put on Depakote.
Oh, no I’m allergic to Depakote.
Neurologist says, the medicine didn’t help.
It must all be in your head.
Something is wrong, I say.
It must be in my head I finally say.
Eighteen months go by.
No improvement, but no drug side effects.
Something is wrong, I say.
I have another EEG.
It is extremely abnormal.
Nothing is wrong, I say.
You are a candidate for brain surgery,
the Neurologist says.
I say all right, I just want my life back.
Insurance company requests s second opinion,
New Neurologist says, it is in your head.
The surgery is too expensive.
It must be in my head.
It has now been three years.
Everything must be in my head.
I go to a Psychiatrist.
He orders all my medical records,
I say please prove it is in my head,
so I can drive again.
He says, you have seizures,
It is not in your head.
You were hit by a pick-up truck.
Psychiatrist asks how many neurologists requested,
My neuro-psychological test results?
I say none.
It is not in your head, he says.
I am sent to a new Neurologist.
He says it is not in your head.
He does another EEG,
It is very abnormal.
He puts me on Neurontin.
Life gets better again,
I now have terrible diarrhea,
It must be in my head.
I don’t call Neurologist,
I get dehydrated,
I’m taking 4800 mg per day,
I go into status epilepticus,
Neurologist asked why I didn’t call?
I say I thought it was in my head,
I have to go off of Neurontin.
I am then put on 400mg of Phenobarbitol.
Life is better again.
Life has hope again.
I swell up like I am nine months pregnant,
My colon has frozen open.
The surgeon removes my colon,
and tells me that mega doses of undigested medicine,
is what froze my colon open and killed the organ.
I can no longer tolerate the Phenobarbital,
with the loss of my colon.
I took various epilepsy medicines for twenty one years,
and never got any seizure control.
I did lose my teeth, gal bladder and my large intestine.
I finally found medical cannabis,
It reduced my seizures one thousand per cent my first year.
It also replaced forty three medications that I took daily.
Today I am seizure free from seven types of seizures,
Medical cannabis was always the answer I needed.
Life is so much better.
Life has real hope again.

If you know something is wrong, don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. Believe in yourself, and your own instincts. Don’t let anyone take away your sense of self or your hope.


What is Hope?

Hope…is the opposite of despair.
Hope…is a life raft to a person drowning.
Hope…is not a gift, it cannot be inherited.
Hope…is the opposite of discouragement.
Hope…is the desire to keep fighting back.
Hope…is going forward, even when it hurts.
Hope…is belief in yourself, above all others.
Hope…is not tangible, so it cannot be stolen.
Hope…is seeing a parent to a child that is lost.
Hope…is a dry place to sleep for the homeless.
Hope…is peace for those that live in war zones.
Hope…is food for those that are poverty stricken.
Hope…is the burning desire to overcome the odds.
Hope…is the opposite of all that seems impossible.
Hope…is oxygen to a person struggling for breathe.
Hope…is to desire with some confidence of fulfillment.
Hope…is a friend that loves and cares unconditionally.
Hope…is the appeals process for the man on death row.
Hope…is not something that can be bought for any price.
Hope…is what carries us, when we feel too tired to go on.
Hope…is cannabis and it should never be our last choice.
Hope…is the expectation that things will indeed get better.
Hope…is a ray of sunshine, after any devastating life storm.
Hope…is something we find within our own hearts and souls.
Hope…is cannabis and it should have always been the patients choice.

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