Debbie's Place

A Patient's Point of View

Month: July 2015 (page 1 of 3)

Post Stroke Healing Medical Cannabis

Dear friends, I want to share what I have done the past 4 months post brain bleed. I already had multiple brain injuries prior to this bleed. I had been told there was no way I would live! The blood vessel had a 90% blockage 6 years ago and surgery was NOT an option. I was also not eligible for the stroke shot as seizures disqualifies all epileptics. I have used medical cannabis, meditation and yoga to successfully get my abilities back! This time my heart, lungs and kidney functions were negatively affected. This is new to me but I am still going strong and have figured out how to overcome most of the negative symptoms! There is so much HOPE with medical cannabis! My primary doctor actually looked at me last month and said “you know you should be dead”? I chuckled and said yes I know but as you see I am thankfully not!

Sensitive With TBI and PTSD

Dear friends, as BI survivors we really do feel like most people that we should be able to trust to tell us the truth are no longer there. For far too many of us that is our life reality. Please just have respect enough for us as fellow human beings to tell us the truth! We are rebuilding our faith in man kind and we need support and honesty from others to find our way! Please just be gentle in the way you talk to us. Many of us have PCS or PTSD and can pick up on a lie, judgment or a condescending tone. We BI survivors can pick up on your tone immediately and it can and does trigger many of us!

THE BRAIN TWISTER

 

Sometimes when I close my eyes in the still of the night, I am
overwhelmed by visions of a massive, raging, turbulent twister. I can
almost hear the angry wind howling, feel its rapid velocity, experience
its viscous, jarring, shaking and unfathomable impact. Its visit causes
graphic impressions of being pelted by flying debris, commotion, confusion,
heart-ache and pain. The background noises penetrate my heart as sounds
of sirens, terror, and painful screams, remind me of the onslaught of a
brain injury or possibly better described as the “brain twister.”

Like other natural disasters, the brain twister strikes with sudden
devastation, and becomes a battle of wills between human and external
elements. There is such agony in realizing that when a brain injury occurs
the disaster that is happening is completely out of our control. A tornado
is powerful and unpredictable, and its life span is generally only a few
minutes. In a very short time span a tornado, just as the brain twister,
is a master of destruction, pain, heart-ache and loss.

When confronted with the awesome power of a killer tornado there is
realization that nothing can compete or conquer the inevitable forces of
nature. Likewise when confronted with the killer brain twister, awareness
remains that it can be an obscure and undisciplined killer; a type of
rogue murderer. Just as massive cloud formations can instantly transform
into menacing tornadoes, the brain twister can strike with viscous,
cold-hearted, sudden onslaught. The focused and fearless fury of a tornado
will never be conquered or controlled by nature. Likewise, the brain
twister cannot be predicted, or restrained, its capricious nature allows
us very little control.

The brain twister is like other natural disasters, in that there is a great
deal of time and expense involved in the reconstruction process. The
after-math of any storms fury is painful, traumatic, exhaustive and grief
filled. Many times a structure is rebuilt without the same physical or
structural components. The structure may retain the same name, but rarely
is it ever an exact replica of the original. However, once rebuilt, the
structure does retain the same value and worth, and many times the market
value is substantially higher.

In a matter of time the rebuilding is completed. There may always be
substantial differences, and many hardships may prevail. However, in
general, the traumatic memories will eventually fade. Life will continue
to move forward even though it has radically changed. The brain twister
may have been successful in wrecking all semblance of our subsequent life.
However, as long as we have kind hearts and pure souls, the important
structural components remain intact.

Debbie Wilson Speaks Brain

Debbie Wilson Speaks – Brain Injury Alliance Conference 2015 PORTLAND, OREGON

Memory Box Post CTE

Dear friends, once diagnosed with CTE I desperately needed a better memory strategy! After talking to my son we decided to make a memory cueing box. My son had noticed I could still be cued to names if I could recognize the names in a specific category. Examples of categories are doctors, pharmacy, and all other categories of contacts you need to know how to access yourself! We made a “category” box out of 4×6 index cards. We categorized and then alphabetized it like any address book. I took my address book and broke it down into different “categories” that I most often need to access. The memory box has only a few names in each category, making it much easier for me to get the cue of a name I am familiar with. I also needed a very definitive guide to self safety! My judgement and reasoning were getting much worse. We knew we needed something that would make sense to me. I suggested green, yellow and red colors cued me best to behavior and rules. We put red, yellow and green construction paper up with daily living activities etc. When he asked what I needed I told him if you want me to stop you should put my scooter on the red list and put a three wheel bicycle on the green list. He then understood he could no longer leave it up to me to do the next right or safe thing! This system has been in place three years and is still working for me and hopefully will help one of you!

 

Together

 

Together, we are stronger.
Together, we are lonely no longer.
Together, we are able to stand strong.
Together, we can get so much more done.
Together, is not just a simple word.
Together, is a way to get our voices heard.
Together, is not our old lonely place.
Together, we are hopeful as should be the case.
Together, we are accumulated miracles.
Together, we can fly high like the sea gulls.
Together, means we have a common bond.
Together, brain injury becomes our global song.

 

The Road….

The road got rough,
We had to get tough.
The road got lonely,
Learning to be our own friend was the fee.
The road got surreal,
All things survivors really and truly feel.
The road had many twists and turns,
We realized this was the speeded up way to learn.
The road had way more peaks than valley’s,
This was the hope we held onto when issues were drowning us.
The road held unexpected people, places and many new things,
The road will end up being more beautiful than we could have dreamed.

The “Mirror” Sequel

As I now look into the mirror,
I remember I have often been puzzled by my face.
I can still get confused by the similarities,
It thankfully no longer makes me feel off base.
I know this is called acceptance and it sure feels great.
The mirror always tells a true story,
Yet the person in the mirror is not quite the same.
It is like the same familiar body is now inhabited,
By an intruder who suddenly taught her inner strength can be gained by pain.

I used to wonder “if” one could somehow one day become two?
I can still remember when the mirror showed only one.
But there is constant awareness of this unwanted yet blessed intruder,
That continues to go with me no matter how fast I run.
It is not that I am frightened by this long time intruder,
But I can still get occassionally frustrated by the things she cannot do.
But then I really look in the mirror, in any mirror,
And the mirror says “Yes it is really finally you.”
The intruder came suddenly and gave me no time or choice,
I was once quite indignant this intruder came at such a personal cost.

I sometimes wonder “if” there had been an invitation,
would the intruder have been easier to accept.
Yes, I think I have been able to forgive the lack of invitation,
As I finally experience the two successfully becoming one.
I should know as I am now able to look in the mirror,
And am very proud to see that the transition is finally done.
The mirror always tells the true story,
the person in the mirror is still not quite the same.
It is like the same familiar body is certainly inhabited,
By an intruder who suddenly taught her inner strength can be gained by pain.

Lets Walk Together

We all have mountains to climb,
Lets walk together one baby step at a time.
We all have deep valleys we must cross,
Lets walk together and we will feel less lost.
We all have storms we must walk through,
Lets walk together and share each others point of view.
We all have places to go and things we must do,
Lets walk together and make sure we protect each other too.
We have all felt natures interrupted ebb and flow,
Lets walk together shining inner light so we can guide with our shared glow.
We all share this land and need to protect our shared earth,
Lets walk together so we do not get discouraged about our individual worth.

People In Charge

People lets not be trapped by any misconceptions.
People in charge should always be judged by their actions.
People in charge should be concerned about other humans.
People in charge should not promote civil infused invasions.
People in charge should pay attention to its citizens notifications.
People in charge should always offer society with sane solutions.
People in charge should be held accountable for all their deceptions.
People in charge should be held accountable for all their corruptions.
People in charge should be concerned about getting people life saving medicines.
People in charge are supposed to have the citizens vote before they change our doctrines.

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